Mom has a lifetime of belongings to sort through.
You've got a job, a family, a life of your own, and somehow you've become the person responsible for figuring out what happens to every last thing.
I'll help you and your mom make a plan, navigate the decisions, and get the house emptied. Without turning every family dinner into a negotiation. You don’t have to figure this out on your own.
downsizing mom's stuff
Mom’s moving somewhere much smaller. Her whole house… isn’t.
KATI, ILLINOIS
You, meanwhile, would prefer she brought nothing. Not one throw pillow. Because you already have a house. And it’s already decorated. And it took you eleven years to get it looking like that.
Your brother says just get a dumpster. Your sister says don’t you dare throw out anything of Grandma’s. Neither of them lives within three states. Neither of them is free Saturday.
You didn't volunteer to become the project manager for forty years of your mother's belongings. But apparently, you've got the job. Everyone has an opinion about what should happen. You're the one expected to figure out how, when, and who's actually going to do it.
Mom wants to bring everything. The china. The table that seats ten. Her sewing box. The recliner nobody else was ever allowed to sit in. Thirty years of National Geographic, because you never know.
Maybe it’s assisted living. Maybe it’s a one-bedroom ten minutes from you. Or maybe it’s the bedroom you were finally, finally going to turn into a home office. Right before it became the room where your mom sleeps from now on.
Either way, she’s leaving a house she’s lived in since 1978. Four bedrooms. A basement. A garage nobody has parked a car in since 2009. And she’s moving into a space that is, generously, the size of her dining room.
Speaking of which. The dining room has the china. Service for twelve. Used for Easter, Thanksgiving, and the year Dad’s boss came to dinner.
Mom wants to bring it.
Mom's moving.
Because you cannot be the person responsible for absolutely everything.
You need someone who can look at the whole enormous project, figure out what needs to happen, and help you and Mom make the decisions that will actually get it done.
And underneath the to-do list is the part nobody says out loud: it feels wrong to be getting rid of your mother’s things and your family’s history while she’s still here.
She fell. She broke her hip. She went from the kitchen floor to the hospital to rehab to assisted living, and she never went home.
So now it’s just you, in her house. Her reading glasses are still on the side table. Her coffee cup is still in the sink.
And Mom is on the phone. Asking when she can go home. Asking if you found her good earrings. Asking you to bring the blue cardigan, and the photo albums, and the little lamp from the guest room. And making you promise you are not, under any circumstances, throwing her things in the garbage.
She wants to go home. She wants her things with her. And she is scared to death that everything precious is about to end up at the curb.
You want to do right by her. You also have a job. And a life. And a house of your own you’d like to see occasionally. You cannot spend every weekend for the next year in her linen closet.
So it’s 11:40 on a Tuesday night and you’re typing “what to do with mom’s stuff that can’t go to assisted living” into Google. Again.
Maybe Mom’s not moving. She’s already moved.
There's an entire house to empty. A lifetime of belongings to make decisions about. Family members who need to be consulted, deadlines to meet, and approximately 900 things that have to happen in some kind of sensible order.
I'll help you figure out what needs to happen, what order it needs to happen in, and who's responsible for what. I'll help you and Mom make the decisions about what she keeps, what goes to family, and what happens to everything else.
And when you and Mom see things differently? I'm the calm one in the middle, making sure everybody gets heard and nobody gets steamrolled.
You don't have to be the one figuring out every single thing.
You don’t have to figure that out before we talk.
Tell me about the house, the deadline, and who’s involved (including who’s actually helping and who’s just being opinionated), and we’ll figure it out together.
That's us.
How can you help? →
"We need a plan the whole family can follow."
That's us.
How can you help? →
"Mom needs someone there to help her. And I can't be that person."
That's us.
How can you help? →
"Can we please work through this together?"
That's us.
How can you help? →
"We can do the work. We just need someone to tell us what to do."
The Situation Room. From $497.
- A three-hour or full-day working session with me over Zoom
- A plan for what needs to happen with the house, who's responsible for what, and what happens next
- Two weeks of WhatsApp and email support
- A 30-minute follow-up call, if needed.
We can talk through disagreements, figure out what decisions need Mom's involvement, and identify jobs family members can handle even if they live three states away. Nobody has to agree about every piece of china before we can make progress.
Mom has a whole house to deal with. Everybody has an opinion. And they’re all looking at you.
That's us.
How can you help? →
"Mom needs someone there to help her. And I can't be that person."
That's us.
How can you help? →
"Can we please work through this together?"
That's us.
How can you help? →
"We can do the work. We just need someone to tell us what to do."
Long Distance. $600/month.
- A weekly plan with manageable tasks and priorities
- Guidance on what to tackle now and what can wait
- WhatsApp and email support between plans
- Help working through decisions and adjusting when things change
- You do the work at home. I help you figure out what work needs doing, what order makes sense, and how to keep going when you hit something difficult.
You and your family can work through Mom's belongings yourselves.
What you need is someone to help you figure out what to tackle each week, answer the questions that come up, and keep the whole thing moving.
That's us.
How can you help? →
"We need a plan the whole family can follow."
That's us.
How can you help? →
"Mom needs someone there to help her. And I can't be that person."
That's us.
How can you help? →
"Can we please work through this together?"
Date Night. $1,000/month.
- A private one-hour Zoom session every week, same day and time
- Your weekly plan and priorities
- Personal help sorting through belongings and making decisions
- WhatsApp and email support between sessions
We'll look at what's in front of you, talk through what matters to Mom, figure out what stays and what goes, and decide what happens next. You don't have to spend another Saturday staring at the same boxes, wondering how to get started.
You don't just want a list of things to do.
You want someone beside you while you and Mom work through the belongings, especially when the decisions get difficult.
That's us.
How can you help? →
"We need a plan the whole family can follow."
That's us.
How can you help? →
"Mom needs someone there to help her. And I can't be that person."
That's us.
How can you help? →
"We can do the work. We just need someone to tell us what to do."
In-Person. From $5,000 plus travel. You'll receive one flat quote, including travel, before you book.
And maybe you live too far away, have a job and a family of your own, or simply cannot spend every weekend doing it with her.
I'll come to Mom's house.
- Hands-on help sorting, categorizing, and organizing everything so she can make decisions without having to do all the physical work
- Patient, personal help deciding what happens with her belongings.
- A realistic plan for getting through the house at a pace Mom can manage
Mom doesn't have to exhaust herself trying to lift boxes, empty closets, or work through forty years of belongings on her own.
You get to stop by for lunch and just be her daughter.
Maybe Mom can't physically do the work anymore.
That's us.
How can you help? →
"We need a plan the whole family can follow."
That's us.
How can you help? →
"Can we please work through this together?"
That's us.
How can you help? →
"We can do the work. We just need someone to tell us what to do."
You'll receive one flat quote, including travel, before you book.
In-Person. From $5,000 plus travel.
Maybe Mom can't physically do the work anymore.
- Hands-on sorting, categorizing, and organizing everything so she can make decisions without having to do all the physical work
- Patient, personal help deciding what comes with her, what goes to family, and what happens to everything else
- A realistic plan for getting through the house at a pace Mom can manage
Mom gets to tell me the stories. She gets to decide what matters. And she doesn't have to exhaust herself trying to lift boxes, empty closets, or work through forty years of belongings on her own.
Meanwhile, you can stop being the person who’s biting your tongue while she spends the better part of the morning on a drawer full of rubber bands. You get to stop by for lunch and just be her daughter.
You stop being the bad guy. I ask Mom the hard questions so you don’t have to. You get to be her daughter, not the person carrying the china out to the car.
1
Mom stops fighting the process. Because nobody is forcing it on her. It’s her stuff and her life, and she gets the final say on every bit of it. She’s smart enough to know it can’t all come with her. She just doesn’t want anybody telling her what she can keep. So I don’t.
2
You stop carrying it all by yourself. We figure out who can help, what they're willing to do, and what needs to happen if they don't. Your brother three states away might handle the Marketplace listings. Your sister might arrange the donation pickups. And you can finally retire from refereeing the group text.
3
You stop worrying about Mom’s precious things. The things she loves most make it into the new place, and the family pieces go to family. The chair she reads in every morning gets a spot before the sofa that was never, ever going to fit gets a vote. So when Mom asks if her good earrings are safe, you can say yes and mean it.
4
The house actually gets empty. Every single thing ends up somewhere: with her, with family, sold, donated, recycled, or finally, mercifully, thrown away. Including the National Geographics.
5
You know what to do first. And next. And next. We turn the entire house into a manageable project, with deadlines, responsibilities, and a realistic plan for getting it emptied. So you're not standing in the basement at 9 a.m. on a Saturday wondering where to start. Or starting with the photo albums and quitting by lunch.
6
7
You get your life back. The plan fits around your job and your life, so Mom’s house doesn’t become your second job. And if I’m the one in the house with Mom, you’re not the one sitting through all forty years of it, one teacup at a time.
8
You have someone to ask when you’re stuck. “Is it terrible if nobody keeps Dad’s tools?” Send it to me on WhatsApp and I’ll answer during my working hours.
I’ve done what you’re doing. And it was not fun.
My grandmother had started going through her things while she was healthy and strong enough to do it. Which was a godsend to me after she’d gone.
And I do this differently. Because I know it has to be done. I know nobody actually wants to do it. And I know that doing it well matters. To you, and to your mom.
I’m the only one doing anything. Can you get my siblings to help?
I can’t make your brother answer his texts. But I can give him a job he can do from three states away, with a deadline the whole family agreed to. It gets a lot harder to say “just let me know if you need anything” when everybody already knows exactly what you need.
05
04
Mom isn’t moving for another year. Is it too early to call?
No. It’s the best time to call. Decisions made without a moving truck in the driveway are calmer, kinder, and a lot less likely to end in an argument about the gravy boat.
Do I need Mom on board before I call you?
No. Plenty of daughters call first on their own, to find out what’s even possible before they bring it up with Mom. If Mom isn’t ready yet, that’s useful information, not a dealbreaker.
01
02
Are you going to make Mom get rid of things she wants to keep?
No. This isn’t ruthless purging, and I’m not the clutter police. Mom already knows the new place is smaller. My job is to help her choose what comes with her and feel good about where the rest goes. Not to talk her out of the things she loves.
03
Move-in day is in three weeks. Is it too late to get help?
Not too late, but it changes what kind of help makes sense. Bring the date to the call and I’ll tell you honestly what’s realistic in the time you have.
Do you come to us?
Yes. For in-person help, I come to Mom’s house for at least a week, and the travel is built into one flat fee you’ll know before you book. No surprise invoices later for meals and mileage.
06
Do you handle the estate sale, the movers, or the hauling?
No. I’m not a moving company or an estate sale company. I help your family decide where everything goes. So when you do call the movers, the estate sale folks, or the donation pickup, everybody knows exactly what they’re taking.
07
What if this is more than clutter?
Tell me on the call. If it’s something I’m not qualified or comfortable handling, I’ll say so plainly and suggest you talk with her doctor, a geriatric care manager, or a hoarding specialist before we go further.
08
Don’t see yours?
Bring it to the free call.
the guarantee
You show me the house and tell me what’s going on. If I think I can help, I'll tell you what I'd recommend, how we'd work together, and what it would cost.
You can ask me anything you want. Including whether I think you actually need to hire me. If the answer is “you don’t actually need me, here’s what to do,” that’s what you’ll hear.
And then you can go away and think about it. No awkward closing techniques. No countdown clock. No "This special price expires when we hang up."
You've got enough pressure already.
The call is free. And honest.
Nobody’s stuck.
Nobody’s the bad guy.
Nobody’s doing this alone.
You don’t have to figure all of this out at 11:40 at night. Or by yourself.
We can figure it out together. Mom can get her say. The good earrings can end up somewhere safe. We can figure out who else is willing to help and what they can take on. And you can get back to being your mother's daughter.
Nobody’s stuck. Nobody’s the bad guy. Nobody’s doing this alone.